You're A Mean One, Mr. Stern

You're going to get fined for wearing that during a game, 'Melo. (nba2k4life.com)

 
The holidays are here and will soon be over. You're surely rifling through seasonal foods, wrapping paper and scotch tape in anticipation of the festivities. Before feasting on tomorrow's NBA treats, make sure you find a way to get all of these fake songs that I made up this afternoon very existent, oddly franchise-specific songs downloaded so your ears are not deprived of basket-hoop background music during your late December:


Atlanta Hawks: "O Christmas [Jeff] Teague"
Boston Celtics: "Santa Claus Is Bringing Rondo's Headband Back To Town"
Brooklyn Nets: "Hark! The Gerald Wallaces Sing"
Charlotte Bobcats: "We Three Kings (Kemba + Michael + The Blazers' 2013 First-Round Draft Pick)"
Chicago Bulls: "The First Noël Without Derrick Rose"
Cleveland Cavaliers: "Even Santa Claus Gets The Blues When Kyrie Doesn't Play"
Dallas Mavericks: "O Mark Cubino (One Cold and Skip Bayless-ed Winter)"
Denver Nuggets: "Go Tell JaVale About Consistency In The Mountains"
Detroit Pistons: "The Twelve Austin Dayes Of Christmas"
Golden State Warriors: "Feliz NaviDID YOU SEE THAT HARRISON BARNES DUNK?!??!?"



Houston Rockets: "His Beard Had Bells On Christmas Day"
Indiana Pacers: "(Gerald Green Jumped) Up On The House Top"
Los Angeles Clippers: "God Rest Ye Merry, Grant Hill"
Los Angeles Lakers: "All I Want For Christmas Is Synergy"
Memphis Grizzlies: "Rudolph Gay, Our Red-Hot Scorer"
Miami Heat: "Boogie Woogie Santa Juwan"



Milwaukee Bucks: "I Want An Efficient Back Court For Christmas"
Minnesota Timberwolves: "Baby, It's Cold Outside (The Three Point Line)"
New Orleans Hornets:"Grown-Up Christmas List (Doesn't Include Comics, Robin Lopez)"
New York Knicks: "(Half Our Team's As Old As) Auld Lang Syne"
Oklahoma City Thunder: [Redacted in case Kevin Durant really isn't nice, as marketing strategies now suggest]
Orlando Magic: "Santa Big Baby"
Philadelphia 76ers: "Christmas In Hollis" (as performed by Royal Ivey)
Phoenix Suns: "Do You Hear What I Hear When Michael Beasley Says He Wants To Be MVP?"
Portland Trail Blazers: "Children, Go Where I Send Thee (J.J. Hickson Might Shoot Another Three)"
Sacramento Kings: "Happy XMas (DeMarcus' Suspension Is Over)"
San Antonio Spurs: "Carol Of @DaTrillStak5"
Toronto Raptors: "Away In A Manger, Or Any Way, Andrea Bargnani"
Utah Jazz: "All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth Another 5x5 (A Jamaal Tinsely Holiday Jam)"
Washington Wizards: "(At Least We Were 0-0) Last Christmas"

Nic Batum and the Elusive 5x5

Nic Batum eyes an assist during his 5x5 game against the Hornets. (AP Photo)

The triple-double is the pinnacle of stat lines in the NBA. It’s an undeniable achievement of greatness and the definition of a complete performance. Watching the league’s elite fill up a stat sheet and reach double-digits in three categories is an experience every fan should get to see at least once.

However, there is one other feat more rare and, unfortunately, less valued: the 5x5 stat line. The latest example of this came in the form of an all-around effort by Portland Trail Blazers forward Nicolas Batum. Batum had an outstanding performance this past Sunday evening against the New Orleans Hornets, finishing up with the final line of 11 points, 10 assists, five rebounds, five steals and five blocks. Not too shabby.

He’s the first player to achieve the accomplishment since 2006 when Andrei Kirilenko pulled it off one of his three 5x5's as a member of the Utah Jazz. Batum’s performance is one that may go unnoticed by most casual fans, or even intense fans who don’t follow the Trail Blazers. It’s truly unfortunate because the 5x5 stat line is arguably more impressive than the lofty triple-double.

With his performance on Sunday, Batum became just the eighth player in this era of basketball to achieve the 5x5 statistical anomaly. The other seven are Hakeem Olajuwon, Kirilenko, David Robinson, Vlade Divac, Marcus Camby, Derrick Coleman and Jamaal Tinsley — a pretty solid list to join. It’s also exclusive, as only those eight players have reached this mark since statisticians began tracking the 5x5 as an actual accomplishment in 1990.

Now, let’s compare the 5x5 to the triple-double. From the 1990-91 NBA season to the 2010-11 season, there have been an average of 34.5 triple-doubles recorded per season. There have only been 15 times in the last 27 years that a 5x5 has been recorded. Total. Not per season, but in the entire decade. The difference in frequency of occurrence between these two feats is enough to open some eyes. There have been only 15 5x5s recorded, ever, while there have already been 12 triple-doubles this season.

In short, there are some accomplishments that do not get enough hype in athletics. Yes, the triple-double is an exceptional achievement and, yes, it is the symbol of a complete game at the highest level in basketball. However, should it be? The realization of a 5x5 performance by any player is far more rare and, frankly, requires the player to fill up more statistical categories in a single game. Maybe it’s time for the 5x5 to take center stage.


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Friday Roundtable: Merry Christmas from the NBA

Wade. Howard. Bryant. James. Durant. These are some of the NBA's Christmas Day stars. (Getty Images)

BDD's Friday Roundtable is a weekly discussion among three of our writers on a trending NBA or college basketball topic.

This week's question: The NBA season is closer to its halfway mark than it is to the opening tip-off. Each year, the Association schedules marquee match-ups for Christmas Day. This year's slate of holiday games includes a rematch of the 2012 Finals; Boston in Brooklyn; Knicks/Lakers in Hollywood; the Rockets visiting the Bulls; and the Clippers hosting the Nuggets. Which game will  be on your TV?

Shawn Deegan: 
It’s that time of year again. Lights on the tree, presents being exchanged, and basketball brought to the front of the sporting world. With the NBA taking center stage, there will be a handful of games to make sure you see. However, for my money, the one game that is a must watch is the Heat vs. the Thunder. Now, normally I’m a patron for the small-market, under the radar teams who don’t normally get to share the spotlight with the big boys. However, on the big stage, it’s all about the match-ups of the best against the best, and there are no better players than Lebron James and Kevin Durant. Both will play the three-spot in this game, so the odds we see these two square off one-on-one are high. Durant is one of, if not the elite scorer in the game, while Lebron has become arguably the best all-around player in the NBA. Both bring contrasting styles of play and sensational talent that is unparalleled. Any time two of the best meet, it’s a good time to watch, but adding the spotlight of the Christmas Day game should elevate the drama to another level.  


Kyle Davis: 
Knicks/Lakers easily has the most storylines and drama to surely make for a great game, the veteran Celtics taking on a renewed Nets team should be good basketball and who doesn't like a Finals rematch? I would like to cop out and say all three of them but since I have to pick, I'll take the Thunder/Heat matchup. No team is better than the Thunder (21-5) right now, who were on a 12-game winning streak before Thursday's loss to Minnesota. The Heat aren't playing too poorly either, especially at home, where they are 12-2.

This game isn't lacking star power either. This is the battle of Big Three's, and the Thunder's Kevin Durant, Russell Westbrook and Serge Ibaka are playing just as well as James, Wade and Bosh. Durant is scoring at will (nearly 28 points per game), while Westbrook is still finding plenty of shots. It's starting to look like Wade's prime is leaving him (although that's still with him averaging nearly 20 ppg), but LeBron doesn't look to be slowing down anytime soon. Not sure you'll find more pure talent from top to bottom in any other Christmas game, so you know there will be plenty of highlights.

The Thunder are not going to take this game lightly. Durant and Co. have been pegged to win a title at some point, and the Heat took away their first chance last year. OKC wants nothing more than to beat Miami any chance it gets, because Durant and this team are great competitors, and they know who is standing in their way of a title. Yet the Heat still have more to prove ("not one, not two, not three ...").  Both teams are going to want this one for Christmas.


Alex Skov:  
Thunder/Heat is tough to pass up, and, for my money, Rajon Rondo is one of the most exciting players in the NBA right now, but the most intriguing Christmas Day match-up to me is the first game in Staples Center. The New York Knicks are 19-6, but five of those losses have come on the road. New York has allowed opponents to go over the century mark in three of those losses, including giving up a whopping 131 points to the Rockets during a Thanksgiving hangover. The Lakers are under .500 overall, but 8-6 at home. Steve Nash should be back in the starting line-up, which may not solve all of the Lakers' woes (especially on the defensive end), but his presence will make the Knicks' defense show a level of respect that LA hasn't gotten during Gatsby's time away due to injury.

The first meeting between these two anchors of their respective coasts ended with New York winning by less than 10 in Madison Square Garden on Dec. 13. Carmelo Anthony, looking like the early MVP candidate that he is, outdueled Kobe Bryant in that contest by scoring 31 points. While Bryant's attempt to save his team ended with the personal victory of a double-double (31 points, 10 rebounds), Kobe's never been one to take things lightly. The tension between Lakers coach Mike D'Antoni and Anthony led to D'Antoni losing his job in New York, a destination Nash considered as a free agent this summer.

The storyline of Kevin Durant and his ever-improving supporting cast taking on the world's best all-around basketball player and his All-Star teammates is an obvious one, but there are multiple plot twists in this Knicks/Lakers saga that make the drama even more appealing. It's not like Anthony, Bryant, Nash, Pau Gasol and Dwight Howard are bad at basketball, either. There's an outside (read: across the street, past the city limits and over state lines) chance that former D'Antoni and Nash partner Amar'e Stoudemire will be healthy enough to suit up for the Knicks, too.

What was is that D'Antoni said in his first press conference for his new head coaching gig? “If we're not averaging 110 or 115 points per game, then we need to talk"? The Lakers aren't living up to that statement, but no one knows how to run D'Antoni's offense better than Nash.


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Christmas Came Early: A Preview Of College Basketball's Best Weekend Games

KU beat Ohio State twice last season, including in the Final Four, but the Buckeyes will have a shot at revenge Saturday. (bleacherreport.com)

The NCAA is giving fans a few early Christmas presents with a couple of great match-ups Saturday before teams break for the holiday. During a time when many Top 25 teams are busy beating up on Northwest Mississippi Technical College, Saturday features a couple of big-time battles. Here's a look at some the best games of the weekend:

No. 9 Kansas vs. No. 7 Ohio State - 4 p.m. EST CBS
The Jayhawks not only beat the Buckeyes in Allen Fieldhouse this time last year, but KU also won the matchup last year that meant more, defeating Ohio State in the Final Four. Now the two teams will face off in Columbus, where OSU will look for revenge. Kansas has played as well as any team in the country in December, beating three good teams (Colorado, Belmont and Richmond) by a combined 93 points. Ohio State had been nearly as dominant, up until having to scrap out a 10-point win over Winthrop on Tuesday. Jeff Withey has proven to be a defensive force in the paint, and freshman Ben McLemore is a human highlight reel, but Ohio State has a defensive specialist of their own in Aaron Craft and a pure scorer in DeShaun Thomas. This is Kansas' first true road test, so it will be interesting to see if they can continue the hot play away from Lawrence. Ohio State will be searching for revenge, so expect this to be a close game from beginning to end with lots of lead changes.

No. 12 Missouri vs. No. 10 Illinois - 6 p.m. EST ESPN2
This is a long-standing rivalry game played in St. Louis and this year these two teams are evenly matched and very talented. Illinois comes in undefeated after surviving the toughest test so far in a road game at Gonzaga. Missouri's only loss came to Louisville, and although the Tigers also have wins over VCU and Stanford, the majority of Mizzou's schedule has been weak. It's tough to see how Missouri will play after facing four weaker opponents. Missouri's transfers look to be meshing nicely, under the floor leadership of Phil Pressey, and have the ability to score a bunch of points. Illinois lives and dies by the three, which will certainly be the case again Saturday. Brandon Paul is averaging nearly 19 points per game and is making an early case for Big Ten Player of the Year.

No. 3 Syracuse vs. Temple - Noon Est ESPN2
Syracuse, 10-0, got Jim Boeheim his 900th win Monday against Detroit and should be more relaxed now that the milestone has passed. The Orange are facing a Temple squad that has been praised this season, but just lost to Canisius on Wednesday to move to 8-2. It's human nature for the Orange to relax a bit after seeing the result of Temple's last game, but taking the Owls lightly is not a wise decision. Syracuse's advantage lies in the fact Temple is only shooting 30 percent from 3-point range, and that 2-3 Orange zone will make the Owls beat them with the outside shot. This game will be played on a neutral floor in New York as part of the Gotham Classic, so Temple faces a Syracuse team that's only played one other road game. Syracuse should come away with the win, but don't be surprised if Temple puts up a fight.

Other games to keep an eye on: No. 8 Florida vs. Kansas State in Kansas City, Texas vs. No. 20 Michigan State, Canisius vs. No. 21 UNLV

Duke Lands No. 2 Recruit Jabari Parker

Jabari Parker announced Thursday he will play college ball at Duke. (bleacherreport.com)

Jabari Parker, the No. 2-rated recruit in the ESPN 100 and No. 3 Rivals recruit in the class of 2013, chose Duke Thursday over Michigan State, Florida, Stanford and BYU.

This is a big win for the Blue Devils, as Parker — a 6-foot-8 forward from Simeon Career Academy in Chicago — is the third ESPN 100 recruit to commit to Duke next year. Duke had already landed Matt Jones, guard and No. 36 recruit, and Semi Ojeleye, forward and No. 41.

Coach K has recruited Chicago pretty well in the past, including landing Jon Scheyer, Sean Dockery and Corey Maggette.

Parker will look to fill the shoes of senior Mason Plumlee, who is an early frontrunner for National Player of the Year. He'll have to stay healthy, as he fractured his right ankle over the summer, but if he does, Parker's ceiling is very high, especially with the way Coach K can build talent.

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Who Will Be Next To Jump From Cinderella To Powerhouse?

Gonzaga was America's original "Cinderella" team, but now is a terrifying team to meet in March. (sportingnews.com)

Gonzaga started the idea of the mid-major "Cinderella" with an Elite 8 run in 1999. Now the Zags are a consistent top-25 team that is expected to do well in March.

Butler took it a step further with consecutive NCAA Tournament title game appearances under coach Brad Stevens and is continuing to take on a beat top 25 opponents. We've already discussed how good of a coach Stevens is, as now Butler is moving away from that Cinderella title to being a fixture at the top of the game every year. 

It's a tough job for a mid-major to maintain the kind of excellence it takes to become one of the big boys, with less funds and recognition. Many teams haven't been able to hold on after breaking into the limelight. Just look at Bucknell, Vermont or Hampton. We'll see if Norfolk St. or Lehigh are one-hit wonders after last season's shockers. Factors like coaching and personnel are obviously involved and if your breakout coach leaves for a bigger school, your dreams of being the next Gonzaga could end in a second.

Still, Butler will likely be the last team to make the jump in performance level and credibility, so here are a couple more schools in the running to be next in line.

Favorite:

VCU: The Rams hammered their way into the spotlight in 2007 with a dramatic 79-77 win over Duke in the first round of the NCAA Tournament. They only reached the tournament one more time in the next three years (2009) but then had the breakout year in 2011. VCU scrapped its way to the Final Four before losing to who else but Butler. The Rams were back in it again last year, nearly losing to Indiana (63-61) in the second round. The Rams have had the big wins to get themselves known and then made an impressive run to make the nation believers. As long as Shaka Smart is the coach, VCU has a good chance to keep this going. They probably need two or three more tournament appearances and another Sweet 16 birth — as well as some huge regular-season wins — to move into Butler range.


In The Running:

Creighton: Creighton benefits from playing in a conference (Missouri Valley) known for producing talented, mid-major basketball programs. The BlueJays have been a mainstay in the NCAA Tournament since 1999, making the tournament eight times during that span, including five seasons in a row from 1999-2003. Creighton has advanced to the second round three times since 1999, yet can't seem to find a way into the second weekend. With potential National Player of the Year candidate Doug McDermott leading the way, this could be the year Creighton breaks through to the Sweet 16.

Davidson: If Stephen Curry could have stayed at Davidson for more than four years, Davidson could already be in line with Butler. The Wildcats reached the NCAA Tournament each year from 2006-2008, with the climax being Curry leading the 2008 squad to the Elite 8, where it was narrowly defeated by soon-to-be national champion Kansas. Bob McKillop has rebounded from the loss of that great 2008 senior class and is looking to make a second-straight tournament appearance this year. Davidson has been able to recruit pretty well, schedules big-name opponents early in the season and plays in a fairly weak conference, so the blueprint is there for the Davidson name to grow, but the Wildcats still need to go first.



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The Bandwagon: Lou Amundson, Ultimate Hustle Player

The Bandwagon is a regular feature spotlighting NBA players who are not stars in the typical sense of the word, but deserve to have a following nonetheless. Today, jump on the Bandwagon for Minnesota Timberwolves power forward Lou Amundson.

Lou Amundson fights for a rebound against the Pacers. (nba.com)

Lou Amundson's track has led him through the D-League and five other franchises before finding a place in the Minnesota Timberwolves' deep front court. His NBA career has been filled with 10-day contracts, battles for playing time and, most of all, hustle.

Aside from standing 6'9", there is not much about Amundson that says he is a professional athlete in the world's most competitive basketball league. He looks like a strong-jawed softie topped with long blonde hair that's often pulled into a ponytail. For goodness' sake, he unwinds by playing acoustic guitar and rides a bicycle to work (an idea that a much more well-known competitor borrows from time to time).

Actually considering him a "softie" would be a mistake, however. Now in his eighth year in the Association, Amundson's defined his game with relentlessness and energy that have made him a valuable asset off the bench in all of his stops, perhaps most notably with the Phoenix Suns.

Over the course of 155 games with the desert troupe, Amundson found a niche with one of the best second units of the late 2000s. He found minutes primarily at the power forward position — although he did occasionally play as a stretch-center — and put up the best numbers of his career.

Putting the statistics of a role player of Amundson's caliber into text undermines their worth in the context of a team. He averaged 4.5 points, four rebounds and 0.9 blocks per game during those two years in an average of 14.3 minutes per night. By no means are those Earth-shattering figures, but they do quantify Amundson's performance by standard basketball means. His advanced stats (an above average offensive rating both seasons, grabbing nearly 15 percent of available offensive rebounds in 2008-09, .118 WS/48 in 2009-10) get a little closer to showing the actual impact that Amundson's intangibles had on the Suns as a whole.

Season	Tm	PER	TS%	eFG%	ORB%	DRB%	TRB%	AST%	STL%	BLK%	USG%	ORtg	DRtg	OWS	DWS	WS	WS/48
2008-09	PHO	13.3	.530	.536	14.9	15.3	15.1	3.7	1.5	4.6	15.1	108	109	0.8	1.0	1.8	.082
2009-10	PHO	14.4	.562	.551	13.1	19.9	16.7	3.7	1.0	4.4	14.6	113	107	1.5	1.3	2.9	.118
Career		12.6	.497	.494	13.9	17.8	15.9	3.4	1.4	4.4	15.4	103	106	1.8	4.5	6.3	.078

Provided by Basketball-Reference.com: View Original Table
Generated 12/17/2012.

Even those, though, fail to justify his play. The one thing that Amundson absolutely never did in Phoenix — and never seems to do, ever — is give up on a play. Heard of playing through the whistle? This guy does it. Looking for a player who doesn't pause to congratulate himself? Throw some attention Amundson's way.

He's blue collar, and that may turn some people off of him. He's not a triple-double threat. There's very little flash to Amundson's game because he grinds in the post. In his most visible years (those in Phoenix), he played on Steve Nash's team. His collective efforts there earned him a roster spot with the Golden State Warriors in 2010-11, where he played all seven of his career starts. Again, though, the Bay Area storyline was elsewhere, centering around tension between Stephen Curry and Monta Ellis in the back court, eventually resolved and replaced when Ellis was traded to Milwaukee for Andrew Bogut. Golden State acquired David Lee the same summer Amundson arrived, and the starter naturally garnered more attention than the back-up.

To point: "Lou Amundson's team" is not a viable tagline in the NBA. It's downright irrational to think that will ever be the designation for an entire basketball franchise.

But you know what? Amundson is fully aware of that fact, and it does not bother him. Shortly before this season began, Amundson said as much to Ray Richardson of the Pioneer Press:

"I don't see being a role player as a negative thing. There's maybe a handful of stars in the league, and everybody else is a role player. I see myself as a basketball player, first and foremost, somebody who cares about winning and wants to be competitive."

(Tom Szczerbowski/US Presswire)

There are only a handful of players in the NBA who will be so earnest as to say they have no qualms being a grace note in his team's anthem. The confidence needed to be an athlete at the highest level of a sport rarely allows for such honesty. T-Wolves head coach Rick Adelman knows Amundson's time in the NBA's little brother league shaped the forward's attitude. As he told NBA.com:

"The guy has worked his tail off. [He] knows what it’s like not to be playing and not to be on a team, so he does have kind of an attitude. He has an understanding of what it takes, and nothing’s been given to him. He’s hungry."

A coach would be remiss not to highlight his players' good sides, but knowing how Amundson has worked — emphasize that word — his way from a non-power conference school in college (UNLV) through undrafted status to All-NBA D-League First Team and D-League Rookie of the Year honors as a member of the Colorado 14ers (now the Texas Legends). After parlaying that success into a series of short contracts, Amundson proved himself as a valuable member of the Suns' bench and went to the Western Conference Finals in his final season with the franchise. His latest playoff appearance came last year as a member of the Indiana Pacers, who were defeated in the Eastern Conference Semifinals by the Miami Heat's LeBron James Show.

Based solely on the talents of Kevin Love and Ricky Rubio, the Timberwolves were supposed to be a fringe playoff team this season, and they may still be. He is only played 87 minutes in 10 games this season, but the fact that Timberwolves management sought out Amundson while revamping their roster to become a competitor in the West says something about his character.

Amundson's humble attitude belies his tenacity on the court. Each time he steps on the hardwood, Amundson seems to believe it will be his last. That's how he plays, at least, and isn't that the kind of player that is essential to basketball at its purest?

At the very least, that's the kind of player that can anchor a bench, and Amundson isn't asking for any more than that.


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